NOT Happy at all

i do really not happy recently! i duno why!!
i do not know why am i so unhappy!!
Is it because i have no chance to have dinner with her when she back Ipoh this time?
Is it because i know i will fail 2 subject on this Y1S3's results?
or Is it because i doubt the existence or the occurrence of everything about me or related to me?
Why am i not happy at all?

Even the most important thing is
I have LOST faith on HIM!!
I doubt my existence that HE created me!
I lost my purpose of life!
What the planning HE planned on me?
How can i know that?
I do really know nothing about me of what HE planned on me?
How do i find it?
I really desperate now!!
I can't smile as usual when i am not happy at all!
If i smile i will feel i am a faker!
If i not smiling, people thought i am emo-ing!!
Or actually i am a emo person?

I do not what is going on about me?
Who i am?
What am i for?
I don't know everything about me!!